Being helpful or Condescending?

Do you ever come across those people who swear they want to “help you” but you feel as though they have other interior motives?

I have come across many intelligent individuals within my school and personal career & many of them in deed like to help out others who may not understand certain material as quick or as well as them.  Then there are those who think they are better than you, smarter, wiser & wittier. They like to make you feel as though you are beneath them in one shape or form.

I personally ask for help when I need it, when I truly feel as though I need some assistance, advice, etc.  What I don’t like is to feel belittled, inferior and or being interrogated.  I acknowledge the older & wiser.  It is one thing to be helpful and another to be condescending.  Do they get satisfaction out of seeing you squirm and search for answers?  I don’t like to be constantly questioned and attacked.

When I am at work I like to work and fulfill my job duties and when I am in school I like to be the studious student.  But when I am at work, that is my FREE time and if chose to shun out some learning until class then that is my choice.  I hate when people try to put/push things onto me.  Work is work, School is school.  Two different atmospheres.

I am all for learning new things, gaining knowledge but it’s another when I am being interrogated/questioned about things to make me feel smaller and beneath you.  I don’t like people who try to sway and change me into believing what they believe, see what they see, act they want me to act, do what they want me to do, etc.  I am my own person and individual with my own mind, morals, values, and thoughts and if I don’t let people push me over and that makes me STUBBORN then SO BE IT!

(My second part-time job is in a little bit of a laid back setting, I care for a man with Parkinson`s disease who is a retired teacher who quite often tries to “teach” me things and goes about it the wrong way.)

Lord give me patience!!!!  🙂

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6 thoughts on “Being helpful or Condescending?

  1. chris9911 says:

    wow, that must really test your patience. I also follow one other blogger that takes care of a relative who also has Parkinson’s, and its not pretty 😦
    Work definitely stinks. I know what you mean about dealing with those kind of people, because they are everywhere. Worst part about working with those type of people is, sometimes you become one of them. Sadly to say I am guilty of that 😦 I work in an environment where EVERYBODY is a “genius” and EVERYBODY thinks they are above you. I would get chewed up and spit out the other end if I can’t take it and throw it back at them. Loving family and friends are my only anchor point for staying positively rooted 🙂
    Just hang in there and good luck avoiding these type of people 🙂

    • xoEvelynOrtizHasSpoken says:

      lol. Well in a work environment where it is a directive response to your co-workers and everyone seems to participate then it isnt to bad :-p

      Lately he hasnt bothered me too much with his “teachings” which I am happy about. It just made me unconfortable because he was like demanding that I pay attention, learn & give him feedback 0_o
      Like really?

      I just stated to him, “If I am in need of help, then I would ask for it” 🙂 . I tried to have patience but he was crossing over boundaries haha. I go to work & not learn especially if right after I have to go to a 2-3hr course.

  2. jannatwrites says:

    It is difficult to tolerate these types of people, but sometimes I think they are put in our lives to test our patience.

    Sometimes it helps me to remember that this type of behavior is often a response to an insecurity the person has (they want to believe they are better than us because it boosts their ego.)

    In the case of the teacher with Parkinsons’, he may be struggling with his loss of independence and loss of authority, so he’s using you (a person of the younger generation) to give him self-worth.

    (I’m not trying to be a know-it-all, so please feel free to disregard this comment if you think it’s stupid :))

    • xoEvelynOrtizHasSpoken says:

      No, No I feel like you have made valid points & I thought of that as I came up with this blog post however, I think for the most part he wants to boost his ego.

      A part of him may want to help me but he makes comments like “why are paying $600+ in a summer course if your not learning anything”. In the course I barely take notes, I just work on the assignments – so that was his outburst. A lot of the things in the course I already know so why waste paper, I can just read over it if I want in the text.

      If I reply & its not in the same exact words he would use then I am wrong & I dont like that. He has also said to me “thank God your pretty” .. like really ?

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