Letter to Myself

I once said that I would never be that girl,

The one who let her emotions get the best of her.

I was happy being alone until one came along,

Came along & made me fall in love?

Was it even love?

At that moment it was all I knew,

My first love, puppy love.

Finally came to a crashing end,

How could this be?

So blind sighted,

Allowed myself to be physically & emotionally drained,

Giving all of me,

Had nothing of myself,

Who was I?

Who did I become?

I swore I wouldnt be that girl,

I thought I would be far more independent and strong,

Yet I was this lost puppy allowing myself to be owned,

What happened to my home training?

Burned from the one before,  Jaded.

Priceless Moments

Life is about priceless moments, whether it is big or small; if it matters to you then its perfect ♥

People who make an effort to be in your life through the thick and thin are those whom matter most & moments with these people are priceless.  Having such a great support system not in only in my personal life but through this blogosphere, work field and school; are definitely composed of all things that keep me grounded and going.

I don’t know where I would be today without some of the most influential people in my life.  Above all my family is important and its just an added bonus that I have my awesome boyfriend, a chosen few of friends, acquaintances, co-workers, etc. that are there for me in different ways.

My priceless moment collage above is just a snippet of the unforgettable moments that I have had thus far.

The Christmas Tree was a day my boyfriend took me out to see the infamous Rockefeller Tree in NYC.  The next is a picture of me & Jennesis.  Her mother & I had went out to lunch and had an awesome time, she is getting so big and too quick!  I hope she remembers her auntie. Haha.  In the corner was the day of the sunset with the Geese.  Days to relax and watch the sunset, forget everything else and its just you and nature.  Me with the two kids, are my sisters niece & nephew who came out to visit us.  We went go-carting and had a wonderful lunch that day.  I was a kid again racing them in go-carts!  Above that was a family reunion picture.  My cousins and I haven’t seen each other in about 6 years and it was nice to have spent last weekend with them catching up!  Next to that is a collage of my 21st birthday celebration.  A small milestone, unforgettable birthday with the best people.  The most memorable thus far since my Sweet 15 <3!  Below it was the Spirit Lunch cruise my boyfriend and I went on last summer.  It was both a first for us, spending a day on a cruise ship.  We ate , danced & were able to site see NYC and the new development of the Twin Towers.  Bottom left, a collage of lunch at Bryant Cafe, NYC.  My first time eating there.  It was the cutest day ever.  I met my boyfriend at Penn Station when he got off from work, then from there we walked to the park and had our lunch within the beautiful scenery and people scrambling about the park.  Beside this pic is me & my dog CoCo Chanel,  I love this dog – she is like a mini person and has so much personality and love to give.  Last but not least is another collage of the night of my 21st birthday!

This is just a snippet of some of the most memorable and priceless moments, that I have had.  These pictures have captured some moments that I will always cherish and there are some not posted above that I hold quite dear.  All of these moments represent a great moment of time that were spent with family and friends who matter most.

🙂

Those who want to be apart of your life will make an effort to as long as you let them, give to receive.  Win- Win relationships  are when both parties are actively working together to make that relationship work; whether if its a friendship, boy/girl relationship, family ties, co-workers, etc.

Life is about priceless moments, whether it is big or small; if it matters to you then its perfect ♥

Do you have any unforgettable moments, priceless moments spent with people you cannot see yourself without?  Are there people in your life that seem to be around when its convenient for them & don’t seem to be there through out it all?  Having a great support system is the best thing that I could ever ask for because with this I can conquer the world, well Evelyn`s world. :-p lol 

(I am now rushing off to work , but  I Just had to get this blog post posted.  I shall respond to pending comments asap!  Thanks always for reading/commenting ❤  Enjoy your day!!)

Broken But Pieced Together

Broken up inside,

From the person I once loved,

Dead my heart and soul,

Afraid,

I denied your love & acceptance.

Finally I let myself go,

Waiting for your love and acceptance.

Never did I thought I would fall in love again,

Now I know what it feels like to love.

Sometimes we have to suffer,

In order to experience the good,

With you I have had unforgettable experiences,

I hope that this is real,

Because from this dream I would not want to wake. ❤

Xo E.Lyn Ortiz

Roto por dentro,

Por la persona quien antes ame,

Muerta, mi corazón y el alma,

Con miedo,

Negaba el amor que me quieras dar.

Finalmente me deje llevar,

Esperando el amor y acceptencia.

Nunca pense caer en el amor,

Ahora se lo que es amar.

Hay veces hay que sufrir,

Por sentir lo bueno,

Contigo yo hay tenido experiencias inolvidables,

Espero que esto sea real,

Porque de este sueno no quiero despiertar  

–        Xo E.Lyn Ortiz 

Diversity Through These Eyes

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With diversity there comes a mixture of new ways of expression, and a different atmosphere. Not all places are diverse as America – that is …

          What is diversity?  It is the defining characteristic that allows present day America to develop what has been called a “salad bowl” or “melting pot” culture – by bringing together the influences of many.  Different cultures and ethnicities are able to combine themselves, yet maintain distinctive their own characteristics and idiosyncrasies.  Diversity is a term that doesn’t include just you, or me – but all influences, both unique and combined.

There is the variety and change, the sharing of ideas, thoughts, and dreams that gives us all individual meaning.  Diversity births competition and edge.  Through progress, evolution, and gradualism, the term “diversity” has come to a new profound meaning.  Those before us through great trials, facing tribulations and opposition whom continued to fight laid stepping stones to lead to this new diversified dynamic world.

Thomas Jefferson wrote the Declaration of Independence, Mary Wollstonecraft was the founder of feminism, Rosa Parks committed the simple act of defiance against segregation, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream of an equal and just society, in 1872 Victoria Claflin Woodhull was the first woman in history to run for president, and currently we have an African American president.  America is “The land of the free, and the home of the brave”; also “land of opportunity”.  Our society is one that prides itself on cultivating and welcoming diversity.  The Declaration of Independence promotes individual independence, Mary Wollstonecraft advocated equality of the sexes, and Rosa Parks and Dr.Martin Luther King have both paved the way to desegregation.  These past acts of defiance have allowed all of these present day cultures to blend.

Figures such as Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., who took a stand against inequality, have allowed me to reap the benefits of the “security of justice” and touch the riches of freedom.  Because Rosa Parks was defiant against segregation, I am allowed to sit anywhere on a bus when I take public transportation.  There are many world figures and acts of defiance that have contributed to and cultivated this multi-colored world that we live in today.  In this present day, I am presented with multiple opportunities because of our diverse culture: I am entitled to receive an equal education, while working part time for the county, I have met people from other countries, I am bilingual, I can marry whomever I desire, and I can claim myself as an independent woman.  Not a slave, nor a house wife, or living under any other stereotype or with any ball and chain.

Diversity will only increase over time in correlation to the population increasing, as well as the increased ability to share and converse with a broader audience.  The Native Americans were here uninfluenced until the Europeans hit the shores, and now we continue to have mass immigration of Hispanics, as well as other ethnic groups.  We are all immigrants in a sense, or at least our ancestors were.  Asians, Africans, Hispanics, and Europeans – they all contribute to immigration and the variety of culture, religion, food, language that are quilted into American society.

With diversity there comes a mixture of new ways of expression, and a different atmosphere.  Not all places are diverse as America – that is what makes us unique.  It’s an etched quilt that echoes all voices to be heard.  Peace and harmony shall be embraced among such a variety of shades of people.  Together we shall join hands as a community, one tribe – all brothers and sisters.  We shall try to accept, acknowledge, and understand those who may be different from us.  Diversity is a growing focal point of American culture that is expressed globally in different volumes.

Subliminal judgment

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People judge and pre-judge,
On pre-conceived notions,
Subliminal messages aimed at you.

So vocal about the life you live,
Without questioning why,
Try to break down your character.

No two lives are alike,
So you cannot compare any two.

– Evelyn Ortiz *

Racing Through Life, Slow Down ?

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We sometimes race through life and don’t take enough time for ourselves.  I often find myself anxious, nervous and stressed out.  I realized that it is taking a toll on my health.  I am physically & emotionally drained.  It is time for me to slow down…

It is hard to fathom that at age 21 my health will be hindered for the rest of my life and I will be dependent on medication.  At the age of 18 I had a Cardiac arrhythmia and spent the night in a hospital bed, thinking why me?   How could this have happened?  My heart rate was extremely high, my pulse was as high as 200bpm!

It was a traumatic event but I was able to move on with little to none complications && now at the age of 21 I have been diagnosed with Hypertension High Blood Pressure just this passed weekend. 

My mind went blank …  I am overly consumed with questions, comments, concerns, confusion, sadness, shock, etc.  I want to wake from this dream but this is my reality 😦

 

Shades of Gray & Blue

THE GIRL IN THE SHADOWS,

HAS A FACE BUT REMAINS NAMELESS,

HAS A LOT TO SAY,

A LOT TO DO,

BUT DOESN’T EXPRESS HER SORROW,

SHE SITS ALONE,

OVERWHELMED,

MANY THOUGHTS RUN THROUGH HER HEAD,

MANY TO BE UTTERED FOR OTHERS TO HAVE HEARD,

WANTS TO SPEAK OUT,

WHY CANT THEY HEAR HER?

THEY MAY LISTEN BUT NEVER INTERPRET,

SHES AN INCOMPLETE FRACTION,

THERES ADDITION BUT MIRE SUBTRACTION,

POETIC BEAUTY LIVES WITHIN,

IT’S THE MOTIVATION TO CONTINUE THE ABSTRACT PAINTING OF THE SHADES OF GRAY & BLUE.

–          This was a poem I wrote a long time ago when I first discovered my love for writing. *